Parade Day!! Johnny's Runnin' of the Green 2011

So I have been really quiet here.
Saturday I ran the first race of the season here in Western NY. The weather was a balmy 36 degrees, my running partner blew out his knee. I was torn. He really wanted to run, but decided he would walk it. I think I disappointed him by running it..... he smiled and sent me off, but he was so sad. I ran it for both of us. I missed him.... I finished the 5 miles in a respectable 47:36 and ran back to him and walked with him to the finish line.

I went home took a nap, totally avoiding the amateurs on Parade Day. I would go out later. I took a nap, settled the kids to their people for the evening and set out for the evening. I am still having an issue eating. I am so confused by the tightness. Some things just go down fine, some things, well just not good at all.. I carry a big coffee cup in the car for puking emergencies. Beer goes down good. LOL

I am trying some new things. Greek yogurt. I need to ask if any of you think that greek yogurt is actually just sour cream with fruit in it? I am also trying whey protein shakes. I am also upping my water intake. I get grumpy, tired, listless, and just down in the dumps. I run a lot and spin and swim. I am actually taking it asan easy week in honor of my still out of commission running partner. We did swim this morning.

I also recognized that I need to surround myself with friends more. Specifically my work friends. I am going to see them in NYC tomorrow! Yay!! I miss them so much. You see I work out of my home office. I travel to see customers during the week, usually day trips, but I don't have regular work relationships. I feel very disconnected and well, lonely. My running partner has had a shift in his schedule too and messing with my "stuff". Figuring out my glumpiness is half the battle. Now that I know what the issue is, I am dealing with it. Tomorrow will be a great mood lifter!!

Son just came home and asked me to run with him. This will be fun. READ: Mom Smokes Son in Road Race!! LOL!!!

80 Pounds Gone!!

Today I woke up and stepped on the scale! The scale that hasn't moved at all for a really long time. I have been eating like a crazy person. Not a lot really (thank you band) but just the crappiest and craziest foods. I have had a lot of puking, so I have actually been having a lot more liquids.

I am also consuming a lot of beer. I joined a running group (actually a drinking club with a running problem...) and having fun with that. The running part that is, well, the beer is good too! Funny, I can't drink soda at all, the carbonation is crazy and makes me feel like I am going to explode. Beer is good though! Am I rationalizing?

I like my new body. I was called tiny by someone yesterday. I never have been tiny. Okay, now I am kinda tiny....

Ames
xxoo

I look like a boxer!!

I have been having band issues.....

I skipped my last appointment because I have gone from almost feeling like no restriction to MAD restriction!

I have been working out kinda crazy like. I am running and swimming and spinning to get ready for my mid-life crazy half Ironman in September (1.1mile swim, 70 mile bike and 13.1 mile run). So I am busy. Work and family also play into the crazy.

I have to actually WORK at eating enough. Protein is my worst puke food group. I am even having problems with eggs. I puke a lot. I finally have gone back to liquids today after waking up to a totally bloodshot eye (think Rocky with a big pool of blood in the white of the eye). Couldn't be good right...? I have maintained my weight, but really low energy.

Anybody else bust a blood vessel in their eye?
Man, and tonight is my high-school reunion..... Yay!

My Favorite Little Book.....

I gave my "best friend with benefits" this little book called I Like You by Sandol Stoddard Warburg. He regularly sends me excerpts from it in texts. Did I tell you I love him a little bit......? I am going to type out the words - the book is about the size of my hand.

Works Cited:

Warburg, Sandol Stoddard. I Like You. New York. Houghton Mifflin. 1965.

I like you...And I know why I like you because....You are a good person to like...I like you because...When I tell you something special...You know it's special

And you remember it...A long long time...You say remember when...you told me...Something special...And both of us remember.

When I think something is important...You think it's important too...We have good ideas...When I say something funny...You laugh...I think I'm funny and

you think I'm funny too...Hah-hah...I like you because...You know where I'm ticklish...And you don't tickle me there...except just a tiny bit sometimes

You know how to be silly...That's why I like you...Boy are you ever silly...I never met anybody sillier than me...till I met you

I like you because...You know when it's time to stop being silly...Maybe day after tomorrow...Maybe never...Oops too late...It's quarter past silly

We fool around the same way all the time...Sometimes we don't say a word...We snurkle under fences...We spy secret places...If I am a goofus on the roofus

Hollering my head off...You are one too...If I pretend I am drowning...You pretend you are saving me....If I am getting ready to pop a paper bag...Then you are getting ready to jump...Hooray!

That's because...You really like me...You really like me...Don't you...And I really like you back...And you like me back....And I like you back...

And that's the way we keep on going...Every day...If you go away then I go away too...Or if I stay home...You send me a postcard

You don't just say...We'll see you around... Some time... Bye...I like you a lot because of that...If I go away...I send you a postcard too

And I like you because...If we go away together...And if we are in Grand Central Station...And if I get lost...Then you are the one that is yelling for me

Hey where are you.....Here I am...And I like you because...When I am feeling sad...You don't always cheer me up right away

Sometimes it is better to be sad...You can't stand the others being so googly and gaggly every single minute...

You want to think about things...It takes time

I like you because if I am mad at you...Then you are mad at me too...It's awful when the other person isn't...They are so nice and hoo-hoo you could just about punch them in the nose

I like you because if I think I am going to throw up then you are really sorry...You don't just pretend you are busy looking at the birdies and all that...You say maybe it was something you ate

You say the same thing happened to me one time...And the same thing did

If you find two four-leaf clovers...You give me one...If I find four...I give you two...If we only find three...We keep on looking...Sometimes we have good luck and sometimes we don't

If I break my arm and...If you break your arm too...Then it is fun to have a broken arm...I tell you about mine...You tell me about yours...We are both sorry

We write our names and draw pictures...we show everybody and they wish they had a broken arm too

I like you because I don't know why but...Everything that happens...Is nicer with you...I can't remember when I didn't like you...It must have been lonesome then

I like you because because because...If forget why I like you...But I do...So many reasons...On the Fourth of July...I like you because...It's the Fourth of July...On the Fifth of July...I like you too...

If you and I had some drums...And some horns and some horses...if we had some hats and some...Flags and some fire engines...We could be a holiday

We could be a celebration...We could be a whole parade...See what I mean? Even if it was the...nine hundred and ninety-ninth of July...Even if it was August...

Even if it was way down at the bottom of November...Even if it was no place particular in January...I would go on choosing you...And you would go on choosing me...Over and over again

That's how it would happen every time

I don't know why

I guess I don't know why I like you really

Why do I like you

I guess I just like you

I guess I just like you

Because I like you

Small Pants, Nosy Daughter, No date for Linkin Park

I have been in hiding.

I have a big win to share: Size 8 pants!!

Then I have a troublesome situation: nosy 12 year old daughter who read my journal (oh, and was stupid enough to TELL me about it!!!!) OMG! I hope that I get the chance to have her experience that sort of humiliation someday soon. I literally burned it afterward since I KNEW what she had read.... (I am someone who has just recently been reintroduced to sex after a long hiatus, hence I had a lot to write about.... just wish that my daughter doesn't know all about it now.....)

My date (30 year old hottie guy) for Linkin Park on Tuesday in Toronto just had to cancel because he can't find his passport. So sad...

I need a drink.

Ames

BYOC - Now 3 days late...

Now to BYOC:

1. For $50,000 – would you go without brushing your teeth, showering or wearing deodorant for 3 months?

Wearing deodorant hands down!!! I would lose my mind if I didn't shower or brush my teeth. I am a little crazy about both of those things and occasionally I take 2 or more showers a day and brush and floss like a crazy person (I have never had a cavity...) My big fear is that all my teeth will fall out without warning.

2. Is it harder to tell someone you love them or harder to tell someone you don’t love them back?

I have realized recently what real love is. It isn't a place that you fall softly and gently. It is a place that shocks your inner core. I have fallen out of love before. That was a long and drawn out process. It wasn't a shock to either of us. It was sad and makes me really wonder comparatively the level of love we shared, EVER..... I am not sorry for any dabbling in love that I have done, but I am not really sure about how bad this one is going to hurt. The love that I am in now is like an understanding of someone else beyond anything that I could imagine. I believe in hope and I believe in love. I am hopeful that my heart isn't shattered with this, I can't be sure that I won't be the recipient of one hell of a hurt heart if this doesn't work out.

3. What is on your bedside table?

My nook, my glasses, a Fitness and Wegmans and Runner's World magazine, my iPhone charger stand, and a lamp.

4. If you could be invisible, who would you kiss?

The one I would kiss would know who it was immediately though, cuz he says it's magic. But I also would want to kiss Mike Rowe (Dirty Jobs) I love him for real!!!! I just know he would love me too if he just got a chance to see how wonderful I really am!

5. Repeat question: Summarize your life in blog land and real life.

Blog Land: I am not caught up with nearly enough of my blog friends because I have been busy with work and working out this past week. I am traveling this week so I will have some good down time to catch up.

Real Life: I have been ramping up my travel again and that means work is interfering with my busy workout schedule! Work is messing with my spinning and running. The only great thing is that I am going to San Diego and leaving the arctic freeze-land of Western NY. I might even get a run in not on a hotel treadmill, but outside along the bay!

BYOC - Bring Your Own Crazy (1 Day Late..)

I know it’s a day late for BYOC time straight from Read's Blog I did copy this. So I thought I would participate in Bring Your Own Crazy….5 little questions you can copy and paste into your own blog to give your brain a break and to get to know your fellow bloggers better.

1. If you were on death row, what would your last meal be before your “death”?

I love, love, love Thai food. In fact if I have told someone recently that I would like to roll around in the Thai food that we were eating and lick it off of him. He laughed and said that would be good. I thought it was a good answer!

2. If you drive a car, do you speed?
Yep, bad!!! I actually have 2 teens who say that I am reckless and a speed demon.

3. What movie(s) do/can you watch over and over again?

For Christmas this year I got my favorite movie from my dearest friend who had to search for it on-line. "Truly, Madly, Deeply" it is a British film that stars Alan Rickman, who I find weirdly attractive.

4. What’s your favorite blog topic to read about and your favorite blog topic to write about?

I love to read about everyone's life. I am fascinated about reading about all the things that I am suddenly having to be concerned about now as I participate in life with men....
Shaving, sex, naughty thoughts, food, sex, girl parts, boy parts, fantasies....

I absolutely love when someone hits a milestone. Doesn't matter if it is a weight loss or NSV! All good! I also love how freely thoughts flow from so many. I hope that I sound as good as so many of my blogging buddies.

To write about.... I like to share. I like to ramble about the weirdness in my life. I don't feel, even at this relatively early stage in my banding (couple of days short of 6 months) that my banding defines me. My successes now are more on the things that I am dealing with actually "living" my life. I struggle sometimes to write some of my personal reflections on my blog, uncovering and exposing some good and not so great things about myself. I have been trying to work through a particularly difficult thing right now. I hope that I can muster the courage to bounce some of my thoughts out there. In the mean time, as long as I am sharing.... I have been writing letters to myself with all the things that a best friend should be telling me. I think it is working. I haven't cried in 2 days!

5. Repeat question: Summarize your week in blogland and in real life.

In blogland - I am glad to see a lot of posts, more regularly being updated. I am also adding some bloggers to the ones that I am following more frequently. I absolutely go to Read's blog. I have a big, blog-crush on her!! Shhhh don't tell her. I just know I would love to hang out with her!

Ames
XXOO

75!! Woo Hoo!!

I am down 75 pounds today and am very happy! 2011 is going to be a good year I feel. I ran with my bestest buddy today (outside in the freezing cold) but it was great! I was laughing when I saw this pic for 75 that said "road work ahead", it is soooooo true. We are doing the Chicago Marathon together in October and running outside is so great. Even though it was cold, I felt really strong and happy. Happy to be outside and on the road! We actually had a great time laughing while running. I made him run a full 5 miles when all we had on the schedule was a 4.5 miler!



Had a great week off of work to recharge the batteries! I went skiing with the kids on Tuesday and Thursday. We had fun. I couldn't have kept up with them like this last year! It feels like that was someone else back then..... I don't look back, but I am aware that not all of me was bad, I just don't dwell on all of the negative thoughts that I had about myself!